“Kuuuh!”

“Vampir-dono. Should you be jealous, then I suggest you be upfront. That face you’re making? It’s far from ladylike.”

Vampir glares in my direction, her eyes blood-red, and Sorglos speaks up while chugging down absurd quantities of water. I already know that Vampir acts as refined as any noble, so it’s rather obvious just what it is that had rubbed her the wrong way: the fact that I’d allowed Laladi to go against common table manners.

“Here you go, Reese-san.”

“T-Thank you, Schwald. Ah… It’s delicious.”

Schwald had cut an enormous hunk of meat into slices, placed one on a plate, and handed that plate to Reese. She, in turn, opens her mouth wide and ate it whole. Her tongue’s still out. There’s a small bit of blood that clings to the corner of her mouth.

“Wah…”

I point that out to her, and she panics a little, wiping her mouth clean. She looks at me with unveiled embarrassment.

Her actions constantly switch from something of a generally manly intuition to a more feminine one. It’s one of the habits that make her so adorable, really.

“Come on, you twooo… Don’t clatter your plates when you eat, alriiight…?”

“Uurgh…”

“Hau…”

Now Kühling and Krankheit are being lectured by Anat, all because of their table manners. Those two must be thick as thieves if they keep getting into trouble for the same thing.

Poor Krankheit has a harsh road ahead of her if she wants to be a proper, adult woman.

“Master. Say, ‘Aaaah’…”

Laladi, still sitting on my lap, brings food close to my mouth. I wonder why. It looks to me that she wants to coddle me a bit, but… is that some sort of new fashion trend for young girls? Well, it’s definitely going to slow down our meal, but I nevertheless indulge the adorable girl and her games.

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“Good, now it’s your turn, Master. Aaaaaah…”

Once I’m done with my share, Laladi opens her mouth. She has a point. Returning the gesture is common sense, isn’t it? I deposit some food in Laladi’s open mouth, and she begins chewing. She must really like the food.

“It tastes even better now!”

I feel the same. Eating my meals together with the girls really makes the food taste all the better. Then again, Schwald’s the mastermind behind the cooking. Anything she makes tastes amazing.

Our meal goes on quietly, if we can ignore the occasion glares flying Laladi’s way.

“Hey, since we’re all here anyway… Do you think we should have our regular meeting today?”

Once she’d had her feel of bloody meat, Reese speaks up. It’s a little unexpected.

Oh, right. The regular meetings.

My guild – and any guild, as far as I know – takes one day every month to come together and discuss matters. I’ve heard that other guilds simply rely on the management to meet up. Unlike those, our guild doesn’t pride itself in an abundance of members. It’s why we have all members participate instead of a select few.

Even the guild members who don’t spend that much time in the guild itself make their way back for this very occasion.

“You make a good poooint… We don’t know when we’ll all be together like this again, so that might be for the beeest…”

Anat, reasonable as always, brings her hand to her chin in thought.

“Masteeer… Are you against the ideaaa…?”

No. That sounds good. I tell as much to Anat, responding to her query.

Anat nods drowsily, suddenly dropping her gentle smile and opting for a more serious expression. It’s effective enough: the other guild members seize up, stopping their clamoring and adopting a similar expression.

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Even Laladi, who’d spent this entire time stationed on my lap, returns to her seat. Anat nods, appeased with their newfound disposition. She clears her throat and moves on to announcing that our meeting’s begun.

“We hereby commence the regular meeting of the dark guild, Yelquchiraaa…”

Well? Did you already pick on what it is that makes my guild so special? That’s right. It’s a dark guild.

We are a guild that’s been deemed lawless by both the Kingdom and other guilds, full of members with wanted heads.

Haaah… How’d we even end up like this?

◆

There really isn’t much to these regular meetings, if I’m going to be honest. Emergency meetings held during more extreme moments are one thing, but I just call these regular meetings to see if everyone’s doing well.

There really isn’t much discussion that you’d find in an actual, prim and proper meeting. Nothing makes me happier than seeing them all in good health.

Everyone here tends to be rather enthusiastic with their work, a fact which keeps them away from the guild more often than not. Well, a handful still chooses to stay here permanently…

“Don’t you worry, Master. We’ve never been injured during ‘work’ before.”

Laladi shows me an adorable smile, almost as she’s trying to blow away any worry I might have.

Well… Being told that is one thing, but…

I can clearly see that Ritter, Reese, Kühling, and even Krankheit are injured… They all have bits covered by dressings, bandages, and gauzes as we speak.

“That’s right! Like Lala said, we never get hurt ‘during work.’”

…Wait, what? I just can’t wrap my head around whatever it is Laladi’s trying to tell me.

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Those four keep getting injured because of all their training and quarrels with the others, don’t they? Doesn’t that mean that there’s just an even greater chance of being injured on the job? I’m familiar enough with the members of this guild. It’s pretty clear that they tend to hold back in those situations.

“Well… That’s not exactly right either…”

Laladi allows herself a small chuckle as she speaks.

…What?

“Well, it doesn’t look like there’s anything we have to report to you, Masteeeer… Do you think we should put a halt to this meeting nooow…?”

Anat claps her hands together for emphasis.

True. Well said. I’ve already had the satisfaction of seeing them all looking in good health. That should do it for me.

With our regular meeting behind us, I venture to rise and leave the dining hall. Strangely enough, I’m the only one who even stands up.

What’s the matter?

“Lala and the others, right? They all thought we might as well discuss work here!”

Laladi’s kind enough to abate my confusion just as it comes. Of course. I get it now.

A small issue presents itself here: there’s always a few odd jobs that guarantee confidentiality. They don’t spring up all too often, but they exist nonetheless. Even a guild master like myself has no right to know about them.

Urgh… I’d love to go out and accept some jobs on my own time, but everyone just seems so opposed to the idea. Am… Am I really that unreliable?

Be that as it may, I used to spend a lot of time traveling before I met the others. The fighting scene isn’t exactly new to me. But I suppose there’s no point in moping about that now, is there?

I tell them all not to push themselves too hard during work, then leave the dining hall.

“Well then. Let’s discuss just how we’re going to offer this world as a present to the Master.”

…I didn’t hear that. Definitely not.

[End of volume 2]